When the lightning cracked, Paul Hardy woke immediately, not because the sound frightened him, but because it warned him, threatened him with Leona's fear. Any moment now, particularly if the lightning came again, she would moan or whimper. Then, brought to the rim of wakefulness by only a slight thunder roll, she would startle up and begin a day's descent into terror. He didn't understand it, though he knew it all too well.
There came the lightning. There rose Leona.
He feigned sleep.
The sharp light came again; even behind his closed lids he sensed the whitened bedroom, Leona slipping from the bed with a gasp. He could see her without seeing her, the movements furtive, her body rigid, tensing against itself. Her eyes would be wild, her lips parted.
She had gone to the living room. She would take a pill first, wait moments for it to have some effect, then turn on the weather channel. They were her preachers, those prophets of natural doom, with their red warnings of deadly lightning, flash floods, severe thunderstorms, giant hail, lethal tornados.
He loved her most of the time; he detested her at times like this.
He knew she wouldn't call for him. She would either leave the house, driving madly across town to May's where she would unlock the back door and hurry down the stairs to the basement, still dressed in her nightgown; or she would concoct some emergency magic-shelter, move the sofa perhaps, lay it on its back, seat-side now a buffer toward the southwest. The sofa was heavy, though, and she balanced her methods against her blood pressure—what would make her safest the fastest. He had encountered her topsy-turvy worlds at times, when he came home during a storm or rose at night to try to calm her. He didn't bother anymore.
If he happened to be at home and awake, she would do nothing except cringe, more and more cringe, until he said "Go ahead. Run to May's." Then she would leave, shamefully, but quickly. Sometimes he wanted a tornado to strike the house, to leave him a survivor, sitting placid, laconic, philosophically always happy, safe or not.
He let himself drift back to sleep. She would probably leave soon. If the house was empty, why shouldn't he sleep? And when the weather was bad, his house was always empty.
It was ten a.m. when he heard their car turning onto the street, and he stepped outside before she was fully in the driveway. The rain had stopped, but the wind was brisk, moist. Dark clouds roiled in the southwest.
"I just came home for a little while," she said through the rolled-down window.
"You said you'd go out to Cave Hollow with me on Sunday."
She didn't unlock the passenger door immediately.
"Leona," he said.
She lifted the button. He slipped in beside her.
"We can't go out there today," she said.
"Sure we can. It's not even raining now."
"But it's going to."
"If it does, we'll sit in the car till it passes. Best kind of summer morning. Everything cooled down."
"I just came home for a change of clothes."
"You look fine."
"This is a nightgown, Paul. You know that."
"Good enough to wear across town, wasn't it?"
He waited in the car while she went inside to change. He felt like a bully, but he wanted her to trust him a little and to worry about his opinion. When she emerged from the house, she was dressed in old blue slacks, a white pullover top, and white tennis shoes, as if she were seventeen instead of fifty-seven.
"Got your running clothes on, I see." He couldn't help it.
As he eased the car out of the drive, he patted the back of her head. "It'll be okay, Leona. Relax and enjoy the drive."
She was quiet a few moments, hands daintily over her purse, one atop the other. She had delicate ways most of the time. She even crossed her ankles when she sat, and her calves were as shapely as when they married.
"One touched down in Oklahoma," she said. “It was on the ground thirty minutes. Thirty minutes. It was a mile wide, and on the ground for thirty minutes."
"It wasn't a mile wide, Leona. It probably cut a mile swath, and you got it mixed up. And this isn't Oklahoma. It'll blow itself out before it gets here."
"They said it was a mile wide."
She was looking out the window away from him, and he knew why. Her eyes were terror stricken. If she met his gaze, they would be shamed, too.
Paul drove slowly. From the turnoff to the park, the road wound thinner, the tall, roadside brush encroached onto the gravel. Paul liked this place and he didn't understand why Leona resisted it so. She was afraid, he supposed, of the surprises that could dart from the shadows, from beneath rocks. She liked open spaces so she could see what was coming; then she wanted a close, safe harbor.
"You'd probably be safer at Cave Hollow than any place in town," he said.
"But I wouldn't feel safe," she said toward the window. “I don’t want to stay afraid like this. It’s dangerous for me.”
"You can stop that anytime. Just don't give in."
She shifted ever so slightly away from him.
He whistled.
She opened her purse.
"Got your pills?" he said, and she closed the purse gently. He wished he had taken her hand instead. He could change his attitude, too, he supposed, make her life easier. But her fear didn’t make sense. She was deluding herself into misery.
Cave Hollow was not a manicured park, with regular caretakers to clear the path, to thin the verdant undergrowth, or to prune the too many trees. It was on the outskirts of the small college town, where, some years before, an alumnus had funded the preservation of the few caves in the area. The money had sufficed to lay a concrete pathway two miles into the small hills, with smaller gravel paths leading to each cave. They were not even true caves, but sloping depressions beneath overhangs of massive stone. Water accumulated, dripped, ran; lichens colored the water and stone. Some semesters a few students congregated in the depression, lighted candles, and recorded their immediate moods in paint or chalk, so the daylight revealed names and vulgar incantations, young wisdom in primitive scrawls. Now, in early spring, rains had sparked an outburst of growth; wild grass, young saplings and bushes branched high, domed the air green.
Paul parked in front of the wooden sign with its black "Cave Hollow," and got out of the car, stretching.
"Best time of year and best time of day," he said. "Sunday morning, no one around."
The air was heavily moist, but very still. He glanced at the sky quickly. The dark clouds were scudding fast, toward them. But he wasn't buying into Leona's fear. He had told her that once. "You go along with things too long, you own them or they own you," he had said. "You be as afraid as you want, but I'm not buying into it. It's yours."
Now she stood by the car. "I'll just wait here," she said.
"The one place you shouldn't be is in a car."
"The storm's moving at thirty-five miles an hour. That's what the man said."
"We got time to walk to the caves and back three times even if it is headed this way. I wouldn't let anything hurt you, Leona. You know that." He was pleased with himself for trying to be gentle with her even though she made him so angry. When she came forward, he put his hand on the small of her back. He wasn't a big man, but she was a very tiny woman, and touching her so made him feel good. He believed she felt the same.
He liked the very sprawl of the place, an unkempt Eden. He often came here alone, and kept a slender but sturdy branch secreted a few feet from the entry path, with which he brushed away twigs, vines. He overturned stones, cracked them against each other. And he named everything for Leona, who knew nothing about the natural world. He identified the grasses for her, and the trees. He identified birds. He stated these identifications casually, but absolutely, since he had learned long ago that the slightest doubt made Leona feel he wasn't trustworthy, and made her, somehow, more nervous. "You can trust me, Leona. When will you learn to trust me?" It became more and more important that she take his word about a serious matter, just once to take his word.
"That was thunder," Leona said, stopping dead still in the narrow gravel lane.
"Miles away yet."
Leona studied the sky. The black line was nearer, meshing together, forming a long, wide bank.
"The temperature's dropping."
"Good sign," he said. Look."
He had walked ahead, now stood on the low plank-bridge leading to one of the overhang recesses. He held his walking branch by the center, pushed one end forward as if to knock someone away.
"Take that, varlet," he said, "and that." He checked to see if Leona was watching. "And so the troll beneath the bridge was vanquished."
Leona had returned to watching the sky.
"I'm going home," she said.
He stepped off the plank. "We got time. Besides, we're safer here than anywhere, even May's basement."
She had sat down on the gravel, opened her purse.
"Don't take a pill, Leona," he said. "Just this one time, don't take it.”
"My heart's racing. I don't want to have a stroke."
"Your heart's racing because you're scaring yourself to death. It’s adrenalin.
Just walk. Run it off. Don't take a pill."
She tilted one of the pink tablets into her palm, and he flicked it away. He was as surprised as she was by his action. It had been automatic, a simple step forward, then a swat of her hand with his own.
Her head was down. Her hair was more white than black now, but still very curly. Her back was somewhat bowed, and her shoulders narrow, but she was precious to him, a little plump and old, but with translucent skin, and very precious.
"I'm sorry," he said. "Take your pill."
He threw down the branch, turned his back to her. He walked across the plank, into the shadow of the overhang.
"I can't get it down," she said. "My mouth's too dry."
He knelt by the water. "I guess this is okay to drink," he said. He thought it was a concession. "A handful wouldn't hurt you, anyway."
She didn't move for a moment, then came forward gingerly, as if she had never been to this place before, had never seen him before. She didn't get on the plank, but knelt where it touched the bank, dipped water to her mouth, sat back, bowed her head.
The air had taken the color of green shadow, heavy, almost palpable. In the distance, a piece of cloud seemed to be thinning away from the rest.
He put his hand on Leona's shoulder.
"Did you get your pill down?"
She nodded.
"Come on. Let's look at the cave."
He took her hand, helped her to her feet. When she started to look upward, he jerked her a little. "Let's go."
"My God," she said. She had looked anyhow.
"It's miles away."
"Let's get in the car, go to May's."
She tried to pull away but he held her fast.
"Don't be stupid, Leona. If it comes this way, we're better off here. Come on. I'll take care of you. I told you so. Come on." Even tugging her, he could feel the shakiness of her, the weakness in her body.
She wavered, stumbled.
"There's a ridge," he said, "around the town. Makes them skip. Makes tornadoes skip." He tugged her into the recess, bending down beneath the heavy stones, then to his knees. "That's why one's never hit here." That was true of the town. He didn’t know about this place. He pushed her in front of him. "Here," he said. "Lie down, lie against the rock." He could hear the roar now, still distant, hear the wind whipping through the hollow, the snapping of dead branches. He felt minute stings as if the wind were peppered, splintered.
Leona groaned.
"We're okay, babe," he said. He curled against her. He could feel her fear as if it were a sound humming through his body. "The pill will work, honey," he whispered, unable to hear his own words above the roar descending on them. "Let that pill work, baby," he said. "Just let that pill do its business."
He wasn't at all frightened, just fiercely alert and curious. He wanted to turn around but he held onto Leona. He could hear it bellowing down, around them, pressing angry, angry. He felt a quick, heavy blow to his back, a sharp pain in his rib cage. He was buffeted, hammered. Hammered into Leona. The sound roared through him, tons of sound on rock ceilings and floors, and Leona.
Then it subsided, whined away, not suddenly over, just less.
He had won.
He was lightheaded, had to concentrate to stay conscious. "Leona?" His side hurt. He thought perhaps he had had a heart attack, was having one, but the pain was on the wrong side, and too low, his right rib cage, front and back. Inside something was trickling, gurgling.
"Leona?" He pulled back slightly and the pain intensified. He groaned.
"Don't move," he said. "Not yet." He slid his right hand from her hip, up to his ribs. His fingers touched something round, hard, held between them, or holding them together. He sickened at the very idea of it. "Are you okay?"
She didn't answer. He lay perfectly still a moment, then moved his hand across her chest, pressed it flat. The motion brought such pain he moaned. Her heart was beating, though. It was beating. "Thank God," he whispered. "Thank God." Then he said her name again, with no response. Again. Something was wrong with her.
He lay waiting for enough courage to pull backward, away from her, to wrench free whatever held them together. Her hair, lovely swirls, smelled sweet, a flower he didn't know. The stone they faced was pitted, the pits filled with dark green--mold, he supposed, some sick, dank life. He closed his eyes, counted to three, pushed and jerked backward, and swam in red and black vision for long moments. He was bleeding, that he knew. He scooted backward till the stone ceiling was high enough that he could sit up straight. Before him, some feet away, his wife lay still, the back of her blouse bloody. But it was likely his blood, not hers. He saw the gray stone that must have struck him. His fingers touched the shaft of rib protruding inches above his waist.
"I'm going for help," he said. "Leona?"
She didn't stir.
"Don't be afraid, baby. I'm going for help."
A few feet from her someone had painted a red heart. He could read "Paul loves" but he couldn't read the lower name. He supplied one. "Leona," he said. He crawled slowly, till he could stand. The plank was gone, but the water shallow. He sloshed across. Leona's purse lay on the ground where she had knelt. He thought that odd—such a tiny object to remain. He walked on. He didn't hurt, either. He wondered if he were in shock. Shock was a blessed thing. The air was cool, shadowy, but he sweated profusely.
"No Eden this," he said, reassured at his own voice.
He thought his car would be gone but it sat where he left it, unmarked. It started easily, like always, drove like always. He wasn't sure where he was going. He stopped at the first place he saw, a white house with red shutters. A child's swing set glistened in the front yard. The woman made the call for him. He insisted on waiting on her porch so he wouldn't soil her furniture.
The ambulance came for him first. He directed them, but had to stay with the ambulance at the entrance to the park. He refused to lie down, watching the path till the crew appeared, carrying Leona on a stretcher. Her body rolled with the movements She was a round little thing. A man carrying a bottle walked by the stretcher. A tube ran from the bottle into Leona's arm. They lifted the stretcher into the ambulance, onto a cot across from his. One side of her face was slack, a crushed flower, wilting and transparent. He knew she saw him. He knew the vision of her right eye was all right. The pupil had contracted. "I'm sorry," he said. "I am so sorry." He reached over the legs of the attendant beside her, and he thought she pulled away.
"Just lie back, sir," the man said. "You shouldn't be moving."
"I just want to tell her she'll be fine," Paul said. "I just want to take her hand and tell her that."
"She hears you."
"Does she? Leona? Honey, you'll be fine. You'll come through this. We both will."
She was moaning. He knew that sound came from her. It wasn't a pretty sound. It was the ugliest sound in the world. He felt wretched, ashamed. He turned sideways. Through the small rear window he could see the trees of Cave Hollow receding. The tops whipped, bent low, rose again. He wanted to tell her she had been right, right all along, but he just watched the trees till they disappeared, tiny flecks of green light, flickering, flickering, gone. Pine trees, he believed, ancient ones. He had read somewhere that people used to burn the needles to ward off evil. She was still moaning but it was more distant, blending with the whine of the wind. His mouth was dry and he licked his lips, wanting to whistle, to dissipate a terrible, rising fear.